TOUCHED

 IT WAS A BLESSING

THAT DAY I FINALLY LEARNT THE LESSON

ALL MY STUGGLES YOU WERE TESTING

TO ENSURE MY PROPER DESTINE

THE ILLUMINESCENCE OF MY SOUL'S ASCENTION

WEARING LOVE LIKE, TROUSER SUSPENSIONS

I NEVER KNEW YOU LOVED ME SO MUCH

LIFE JUST HASN'T BEEN THE SAME SINCE YOUR TOUCH

I SKATE BOARDED ON SATURN

PROMISSING ME YOUR LOVE IN RETURN

I WENT OUT ON A DATE WITH M R. FATE

SQUARE DANCED WITH THE DEVIL

YOUR LOVE HAS SO MANY LEVELS

BY THE WAY PANDORA SAID TO TELL THEM

HOW BEAUTIFUL LOVE FELT

FILL YOUR HEART WITH LOVE,  AND PLAY THE HAND YOU WAS DEALT

BECAUSE YOU’RE LOVE WAS ALWAYS FELT

YOU TOOK MY HAND AND SAID LOOK

INTO YOUR EYES I SAID I DO

OUR SOULS THEN INTERTWINED

THE HANDS OF TIME WENT REWIND

TINY PICTURES THEN ENTER MY MIND

THEN YOU WISPERED IT'S MY TIME TO SHINE

THE KEY TO LIFE, IN MY HEART, YOU PLACED IT

AIN'T NOTHING ABOUT US BASIC

LOVE, JOY, AND HAPPINESS, MEANS SO MUCH

YOU'LL NEVER BE THE SAME ONCE YOU'VE BEEN TOUCHED

I RECTIFIED MY KARMIC

ALOT OF GIFTS, NO LONGER DORMENT

I FORGAVE AND LET GO OF LIFE'S TOURMENTS

IT'S NOT RIGHT A WAR OF TOUGGLE

MY POCKET CHAIN REPRESENTS MY STRUGGLE
NOW, I'M A LET THE TRUTH BE TOLD

I, SALUTE, RICH HOMIE QUAN, BECAUSE HE WOKE UP MY SOUL THAT'S WHEN I SAW WHAT MY FUTRE HOLDS

FEELING VIBRANTLY ECCENTRIC AN ASTRIAL PHONOMINATION, NOT TO MENTION

ASCENUATING TO DIFFERENT DIMENSIONS

STRONGLY GROUNDED, ATLANTEAN WARRIOR PRINCESS

WHO WAS STUNG BY CUPID'S ARROW

MY MIND OUT THE BOX NEVER NARROW

ALWAYS WORKING ON CALCULATED TIME

NEVER LOST, I ACTUALLY FOUND MY MIND

DRENCHED IN YOUR LOVE INTERTWINNED

LOVING YOU THERE IS NO SUCH

IRRIDESENCE OF YOUR LOVE, THIS ISN'T LUST

LIFE'S NOW DIFFERENT SINCE YOUR TOUCH

CHILDREN OF THE LIGHT

WE SHINE SO BRIGHT

WE WALK BY FAITH AND NOT BY SIGHT

THIS INDIGO KID JUST DID A BID

YOU JUST DON'T KNOW HOW I LOVE YOU SO MUCH

THE DAY I DIED WAS THE DAY I WAS TOUCHED

NO ONE HELPED OR EVEN PITIED ME

NEITHER DID I SO YOU SHOWERED ME IN SERENITY

YOUR LOVE LAST BEYOUND AND INFINITY

A HEAVENLY DEVIN ASTRAL ASCENUATED ADRENALIN RUSH

LIFE JUST HAVE'T BEEN THE SAME SINCE YOUR TOUCH

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Self Created Restrictions

Restrictions to an abundant life are self created by a mind that’s conditioned to self serve. One’s own mind creates these limits by keeping you attached to the lie the self serving mind is needed for abundance.

The restricted mind is conditioned to be that way and since it can’t get beyond its own created noise, truth is hidden from your view. This blocks out the ability to see the abundance life provides so instead of being in the presence of what is, one’s defaulted mind set tends to see the view of what isn’t. Learn to be with what is actually occurring and the default setting of the mind becomes one of abundance because the blocks to seeing what isn’t cease to exist. When this occurs the self serving mind isn’t in control and you are free to live without any restriction; the restriction being your own mind.

It’s only a Conditioned Mind that restricts. To restrict is to put a limit on something or to control something, this is what a Conditioned Mind does. Even though it seems like we choose to do what we do, when something is done that’s self serving, it’s restricted because no one, not even the one doing exactly what’s being done benefits because not only is one out of alignment with the Universe, one is out of alignment with themselves. When we go beyond this conditioning, we go beyond our own self created restrictions and we naturally see the abundance of life. To be without restriction is to be aligned with the Universe and to be aligned with the Universe is to be aligned with ourselves without the restriction of needing anything to be different than what it is.

 

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Perfection of What Is

The noise between your ears is what makes you think the next so called fix will make life perfect, so what searching is about is trying to have things as perfect as you think they need to be instead of accepting the perfection of what is.

It’s very easy to get stuck in the habit of constantly needing to arrange life to be a certain way. One is only stuck when they are controlled by the noise that’s between your ears. As the road to happy destiny is trudged our conditioning slowly changes, but contentment should never be based on things needing to be changed. I’ve come to an understanding that life is perfect when it’s accepted as it is. I am perfect in my imperfections as is life. Until this was understood, my searching for perfection remained in place. That’s what the search is really all about anyway, trying to have things as perfect as we think they need to be instead of accepting the perfection of what is. It’s the noise between your ears that makes you think the next so called fix will make life perfect.

For me my searching ended when I understood my conditioning is not me. I don’t try to be anything or achieve a certain state, I am what I am, this is my place of peace and the great thing about this is, it isn’t dependent on anything. Read your books, sit in meditation, go to the gym, do yoga and what not, but none of these things will stop the searching, that is until it’s realized what’s here right now is what one is searching for. I’m not labeling any of these things as good or bad, but if there’s searching labels will be applied. It doesn’t have to be this way, but it will take a mind that is very settled to be aware of this. Just how does the mind settle; by sitting and developing the discipline to allow the acceptance of things as they are. When this occurs, the searching stops because one realizes they already have what they’ve always been searching for.

 

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Being Prepared

Without preparation, the constant pull of attachment will be the norm and so will an agitated mind. Sitting to develop discipline assist so when one’s conditioning is triggered, it’s not as easily given into.

Although life doesn’t personally test you, at times it seems like it does. From death, sickness, situations, people and just the daily so called grind, it can seem as though it’s one challenge after another. What makes something a challenge is a lack of proper preparation. For forty nine years I had tools in place that made everything that happened a challenge and I mistakenly thought it was life doing it. Life just happens, it’s never personal and it doesn’t purposely create challenges. I know it’s looked at in this way by many so we “can grow” but I’ve learned to go beyond this conditioning to see the only reason anything was ever a challenge to me was because of the label that was attached to what happened. Life still occurs just as it always will as one is in the human form, the difference is in the preparation of how to handle it. When my mother died recently I had a sense of how I was going to react because of the preparation that has been going on for the last ten years, but the preparation wasn’t for my mother dying, it was simply learning what are the things that pull me from my place of peace.

I allowed death, sickness, situations, and especially people, to pull me from this peace constantly. People seemed to be one of the most difficult to stop this pulling, but by sitting I saw that people were no different than anything else, they were just given more focus. The key to this is in the preparation of learning how not to attach to anything that happens by making it personal, whatever it may be. Without this preparation, the constant pull of attachment will be the norm and so will an agitated mind. To me I sit to develop discipline so when my conditioning is triggered, it’s not as easily given into as it once was. Breaking these Conditioned Mind Patterns won’t happen without a willingness to go in the opposite direction of selfishness, and this will take preparation so when the mind is triggered to act in a selfish way, there will be an enough awareness to not be pulled from your place of peace.

 

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Selfishness Only Harms

To those who can remain silent goes the spoils of the Universe. To those who have to disagree out loud because of holding on to I am right energy, goes the spoils of selfishness.

The base of most conditioning is selfishness, and although there are degrees in how much hold the conditioning has over a person, it causes suffering nonetheless. Not everyone has conditioning to murder, steal, abuse, rape, mug, and so on, but it’s all basically the same energy so even though some behavior is less harmful, this selfish behavior causes harm all the same, just not to the same degree as someone who is totally in the grip of their conditioning. The tighter the hold, the greater the suffering; to oneself and others. This is what’s at the core of I am right energy. Any disagreement is just a conditioned story, it’s not that everyone will be in agreement with everything that happens, but the tighter one holds on to their way being the right one, the more disharmony this causes; this disharmony is with oneself.

One can only see what is seen and that’s ok, but to disagree out loud with someone brings the conditioned energy to a much deeper level than reading or talking about something and not agreeing and just moving on. If there is an evil in the world it would use the disguise of selfishness because that is an energy that can only cause suffering. This is all about the Conditioned Mind not people. Because of the way the Universe is designed we are all connected, but because of I am right energy, it doesn’t allow it to be seen in this way by everyone, this is a direct result of the conditioning in place. To those who can remain silent goes the spoils of the Universe. To those who have to disagree out loud because of holding on to I am right energy, goes the spoils of selfishness.

 

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I Focused Stories

A story always needs a subject to focus on to be created. We supply the subject of all our stories when our focus is on the base of I. Without I, our innate divinity sustains itself naturally without the need for a story.

The subtitle of my book “You Are Not Your Thoughts” could have been You Are Not Your Stories. How attached one is to their stories is related to how disconnected one is to their divinity within. Every made up story is related to I and the more I controls, the less one is in alignment with their divinity. Just think about how the stories occur, when there’s traffic, who’s in the traffic? When there’s an individual who passes by and there’s an attraction, who is attracted to them? How about dessert, when it’s time for dessert, who is craving the desire to be satisfied? When anything is wanted, who is the individual who is wanting? All these questions have one answer in common, they’re all derived from I and it’s I who is the creator of all the stories. I want this or I want that, I don’t like this, I want this different, I want, I want, I want, all this wanting is just a story that keeps one from experiencing their own divinity.

Without I wanting is to be without a story and without the story there will be enough quietness to hear the divine urging within that is one’s true innate calling. The difference between one’s thoughts and one’s divinity is thoughts create a story that needs I to believe I am my thoughts and then the Conditioned Mind creates a story from these thoughts, but the story isn’t you as your thoughts aren’t you. It all begins with the attachment to I which makes you think your thoughts are who you are. Don’t attach I to your thoughts and it will be impossible to create an I story.

The divine always occurs in the present moment, why this isn’t known by more people is because of the attachment to I created stories. The divine is not a story, it’s divine. It doesn’t need a story, it always is. It’s the human development of I that doesn’t make this known. Anyone who has any inkling of truth in their life has at least minimized the attachment to I. It’s the only way for one to get quiet enough to realize “You Are Not Your Thoughts” and in the process there’s also the realization you are not your I subjected created stories either.

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Created Difficulty

Once one wants the moment to be different, the label difficult is instantly applied, and when this difficultly becomes too heavy just put it down and understand nothing truly needs to be different.

We can live the life we wish we had, we can live the life we think we should have, or we can live the life that we have. These are the three ways that we live everyday throughout our life. When the alarm rings and it’s time to get up for work, if we hit the snooze for more sleep and wish that we didn’t have to get up yet, we are wishing for life to be different. When we are envious of someone else and think that their life is better than ours, or if we think our life shouldn’t be the way it is, we our living a life that we think would be better if it was different.

When we are in a mind state of being with life exactly how it is, nothing has to be different, what this leads to is inner contentment. When we are content with what is, we are free because nothing is holding us back. Living this way, we live a life that isn’t based on conditions for contentment, this is true freedom. Not being content with the way things are creates the difficulty of wanting things different. And it’s a created difficulty because if you didn’t have the thoughts that you wanted things different and just accepted what is, the label difficulty would never be applied.

Our thoughts create our life, along with our labeled difficulties. If you want to believe those thoughts are who you are than those results fall on your shoulders, but it doesn’t have to be this way. Learn that no thought is you and no difficulty needs to be created. In stillness neither exist because neither are present. So if contentment is to be the consistent operating mode of the way your life is lived, than stillness must become the mind state more often then not. Use meditation to bring in stillness, use stillness to bring in peace. It’s the formula for a contented life, and with a contented life there will never be a need for one single moment to be different. Now wouldn’t that be different, but it will only be difficult when you tell yourself it is.

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Through Hell – Heavens Gates

An angel guided me through hell, and asked me if I loved myself. I tried to lie, but she could tell. Said it's okay to ask for help.

And as I walked amongst the flames, a part of me began to change. The inner beast inside of me, had gasped for breath so I could breathe. I'm not afraid, I said with grace, holding onto my mistakes. I've had regrets along the way, that made me who I am today. 

She said these stones were thrown by those who lost their way along the road.

At first I pondered than I asked, is time my friend and will it last? She said of course your mind is still. And life is just an upward hill. Sometimes we're weak and then we fall, with broken backs against the wall. But please remember you're not alone. You'll always have somewhere to go.

It seemed to me she didn't believe, my darkest thoughts or wildest dreams. She let me know that I was troubled, and the price I paid would soon be doubled. I hope that I have made amends, and if not then I'll try again.

She said these scars are seen by eyes, that most won't touch or can't describe. I said I'm  done, nowhere to hide. I've built these walls so no stars shine. But beauty hides in empty eyes. And truth come out within the lies. Innocence is left behind. Just be aware you're born to die.

But due before it is too late, don't hide your shame with masks of hate. Ignite the flame that fuels the rage, and learn to live another day.

Before she left to say goodbye, she looked me, began to cry. Dead straight looked me in the eyes, said you've been low when you were high. And you will make it out alive.

The devil walked me to the gates of heaven but I had to wait. So patient in his evil ways, it's funny but I'm glad he stayed.

We talked about the sins we shared, and just right then I knew he cared. He gave me lots of good advice, said angels sometimes come disguised.

I second guessed, and questioned time. I thought that it was on my side. I'm blinded by these bloodshot eyes, I've tried my best to just survive.

This world has brought me to my knees, I cannot pray or live my dreams. I know that darkness comes from light, and someday that I'll be alright.

I cannot fight these waves of fear, I've carried on throughout the years. But silence is my only friend, when I can't seem to love again. But I have so much left to say, I won't back down or fade away.

You'll find me in a better place, far amongst the fog and haze. I'll lay beyond the verdant trees, and pass by like a summer breeze.

And as he left me there to stay, the last thing that he said to me, was maybe you're not meant to lay, but stand your ground, and find your place.

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Present Moment Peace

As one becomes more and more anchored in the present moment, the created stories are needed less and less; yours and mine. Without a story, there’s a peace the mind settles into because it’s the only thing that’s there.

There is surely nothing other that the single purpose of the present moment. One’s whole life is a successions of moment after moment. If one fully understands the present moment, there will be nothing else to do and nothing else to pursue. Unfortunately this isn’t the way it is for most, so the past and future are constantly drawn on to satisfy the mind agitation of not being in the present moment. Many different stories are used as an alternative to this way and it’s not my place to label them as anything. I’ve found something that works for me and that’s what I share. It’s funny because it’s not a concern of mine if one agrees with what I share or not. I understand we all see things as they’re revealed to us, but people feel the need to tell me how their way is better. There is no right way, there’s living in a way that only benefits oneself and there’s living in a way that benefits all beings.

About all that I know is this, at one time my Conditioned Mind controlled me as if I was a puppet on a string. Because of this, I lived mostly a self serving existence and my life wasn’t much of a benefit to anyone. Nine years ago this changed and the things that I did began to benefit others. I know I write a lot about the Conditioned Mind, but it’s what was revealed to me so it’s what I share; it’s the only thing I can share. As I become more and more anchored in the present moment, the created stories are needed less and less; yours and mine. Without the attachment to my or your story, there’s a peace the mind settles into because it’s the only thing that’s there.

 

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Your True Self

Without the attachment to labels and stories there’s existence beyond words, this is where one will be free from the bondage of self and without this bondage, one can be your true self.

If everything that’s done is based in the self doing it than one must keep doing to keep the self whole. But who is this self that needs to be kept whole? This bondage of self is the main attachment that keeps one entrapped to their own created suffering. Sit with this next part and see exactly where is this self that one so adamantly defends. What if you lost your arm would you still exist? How about both arms and legs, now take every function away expect for the mind, let’s just say that remained intact. There is still existence, and even if you lost your mind there would still be existence, you just wouldn’t be aware of it, so what part of your story of this self is you? The limbs, or the story of the loss of them, the mind, or the story of the loss of it; I guess there wouldn’t be a story if there wasn’t a mind.

There’s nothing to pinpoint where the self is that’s conjured up in the mind. This isn’t to say there isn’t a self, but what part of the made up story is really this self that is attached to? What part of it makes you complete or incomplete? In my case is it my role as as husband, father, son, brother and so on? Or is it my job title or my writings? All of these things exist, but they’re only a story and you may ask who are you or anyone for that matter without their story? Without the attachment to labels and stories there’s existence beyond words, this is where one will be free from the bondage of self and without this bondage, one can be your true self.

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